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Hilarious Sloth Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud is a compilation of the funniest sloth jokes that we could find or come up with.
If you have more hilarious sloth jokes that are not mentioned in this post, please take the time to add them in the comments. We would love to include it in this Hilarious Sloth Jokes compilation.
99+ Hilarious Sloth Jokes
Follow Us On YoutubeÂIn this entertaining blog Hilarious Sloth Jokes post, we compile a collection of the most hilarious sloth jokes that are guaranteed to make you burst into laughter.
These jokes are intended to stimulate your sense of humor and leave you with a grin on your face. They range from playful sloth puns to sophisticated one-liners.
Get ready to embark on an experience that will have you rolling on the floor laughing with these sloth-themed jokes that will have you rolling in laughter in no time at all.
There are actually more than 99Hilarious Sloth jokes in this post. We have added more in the end and you will find hidden jokes throughout the article.
We work really hard on these articles and as a sloth… it takes me a loooooooong time to make. If you enjoyed any part of it please do take the time to SHARE it on FB, IG, TW, and or Pinterest.
Sloth Jokes Legal Disclaimer
However, before we can get started, there are a few legal things that we need to address regarding the content that will be presented below.
- No sloth was harmed in the making of all of these funny sloth jokes.
- The names of the sloths in these jokes have been changed to protect the innocent.
- All Locations have been changed to protect the innocent as well.
- This is a sloth jokes post – If it takes you a sloth minute to get the joke… we understand 🙂
- Sharing This Post is NOT frowned upon and will only make this sloth happy 🙂
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes About Sloths
This post is likely to deliver the comic relief you’re looking for, whether you’re interested in sloths or just in need of a good laugh. So if you are ready for some funny sloth jokes let us begin the fun. Sloth facts are also fun to learn.
Read our post 10 Fascinating Sloth Facts You Did Not Know.
- What do you call it when a sloth eats another plate of food? Slothy seconds.
- What do you call a sloth with a big heart? A sloft-ee.
- What do you call an aristocratic sloth? Slowphisticated.
- What do you call a sloth that studies existence? Philo-sloth-ical.
- When should you apologize to a sloth? Later, much later.
- What’s a sloth’s favorite year of high school? Sloth-more year.
- What did the grape say when the sloth stood on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
- What kind of food will you never find a sloth eating? Fast food.
- Why did the sloths vote to keep the coal mines open? Because when it comes to energy they’re conservative.
- What do you get when you cross a sloth with a porcupine? A slowpoke.
- Why did the sloth get fired from his job? He would only do the bear minimum.
- What’s a sloth’s favorite way to eat chicken? Slothern fried.
- What do you call a cool sloth that barely moves? A slow-off.
- What did the sloth say to his friend who was going through a hard time? Just hang in there.
- Why Did The Sloth Cross The Road? We don’t know. We are still waiting for him to cross.
More Sloth Jokes To Enjoy
Sloths are notoriously slow. Their lives are spent hanging upside down on branches in South and Central American tropical jungles. The five sloth species are the pygmy, maned, pale-throated, brown-throated, and Linnaeus’s two-toed.
- Find out more in our post Types of Sloths Around The World.
- How much do sloths eat? A sloth-ful lot.
- What do sloths make when it snows? Slow angels.
- How did the sloth chef cook his chili? With a slow cooker.
- What is a sloths favorite icy treat? Slow-cones.
- What sport do sloths play? Sloth-ball.
- What do you call a slow sloth? A sloth.
- What do sloths drink in the morning? Sloth-ee.
- What Hogwarts house are sloths sent to? Slotherin
- How does a sloth express gratitude? Thank you slow much.
- Ever heard the one about the sloth crossing the road? Never mind, it’d take too long.
- Why didn’t the sloth go extinct? It didn’t plan on going anywhere.
- When Does A Slow Sleep? Every Sloth Moment.
- What did the tortoise say when she was dating the sloth? Let’s taaaaake it sloooooow.
- I watched a sloth eat a watch once. It was very time-consuming.
- One sloth turned and said to the other, “I used to dislike moss…” “But now I think it’s growing on me.”
Sloth Knock Knock Jokes
Are you enjoying our collection of hilarious sloth jokes? If you’re ready for a good laugh, you’ve come to the right place. Sloths are known for their slow movements, but that doesn’t mean they can’t bring the funny.
- Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Canyous
Canyous who?
Canyous sloths move any faster?
- Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Annie.
Annie who?
Annie one know how to get a sloth to come down from a tree?
- Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Interrupting sloth.
Interrupting sloth who?
15 seconds later…
SLOOOTTTHHHHH”
- Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Sloth
Sloth who?
Just how many sloths do you know?
Do you know of any other Sloth Knock Knock Jokes we can add to this list? Let us know in the comments so that we can add them to this list. Or you can always contact us.
Longer Hilarious Sloth Jokes
One of the sluggish and cutest animals on the globe is the sloth. They are a great subject for humorous jokes because of their calm and laid-back demeanor. You might find these longer funny sloth jokes amusing.
- A sloth goes to a bar to get drunk. After a long time and a lot of drinks, the bartender asks the sloth why he is there. The sloth replies, “I’m depressed, my wife is leaving me. I bet she’s already halfway through the kitchen.”
- The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.
Three weeks later, a sloth walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth.
The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes.
He took the precious book out of the sloth’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward, and exclaimed, “It’s a miracle!”
“Not really,” said the sloth. “Your name is written on the cover.”
- A sloth named Herman is walking through the forest one day. A gang of snails approached him and beat him up for 7 hours. He is left at the bottom of a tree with several cuts and bruises. Several hours later, he gathers up enough strength to go to a local police station. Herman walks into the Sergeant’s office.”What happened to you? the officer asks.”A gang of snails beat me up,” Herman replied.”Can you describe what they looked like?” “I don’t know,” the sloth says. “It all happened so fast.”
- A student named Jacob was sitting in class one day and the teacher walked by and asked her “How do you put an elephant in the fridge?”
The teacher said, “I don’t know, how?”
Jacob then said, “You open the door and put it in there!”
Then Jacob asked the teacher another question “How do you put a sloth in the fridge?”
The teacher then replied, “Ohh I know this one, you open the door and put it in there?”
Jacob said, “No, you open the door, take the elephant out, and then you put it in there.”
Then he asked another question…”All the animals went to the lion’s birthday party, except one animal, which one was it?”
The teacher was a bit confused and said “The lion?”
Then the student said, “No, the sloth because he’s still in the fridge.”
He then asked her just one more question….”If there is a river full of crocodiles and you wanted to get across it, how would you”
The teacher then says “You would walk over the bridge.”
Then Jacob says “No, you would swim across because all the crocodiles are at the lion’s birthday party!”
She laughs and walks away.
- A sloth walks into a bar
When he gets to the counter, he tells the bartender,
“I’ll take………………… a club soda.”
The bartender says, “What with the long paws?”
- Another sloth walks into a bar
Well actually, I got ahead of myself, it’s still walking there…This is taking longer than I expected… Never mind, I’ll finish the joke when the sloth finally gets here.
Sloth One-Liner Jokes
This article contains a collection of humorous sloth One-Liner Jokes that you can use any time someone brings up sloths in conversation.
- I watched a sloth eat a watch once. It was very time-consuming.
- Folks probably love sloths because of their cute smile.
- Sloths are so slow that every move seems to take forever.
- Sloths are always listening to slow music.
- I was watching a video of a sloth for 10 minutes yesterday. Turned out, it was just a picture.
- Sloths are cute. Fur real.
- Sloths just love slothern fried chicken.
- The slot machines were so slow that the casino-goers called them sloth machines.
- Sloths are the most social animals. They always want to hang out.
- People say that I am slothful. That’s an allegation. l am going to explain later.
- Sloths always get home late… they lose track of time when their hanging out.
- The post office was having trouble finding enough mail carriers for the holidays. Apparently, it takes time to fly sloths in from other countries.
- I could tell the sloth came from high society… he was much more slowphisticated…
- Sloths have a pretty healthy diet since they don’t eat fast food.
- A sloth would not a good Santa, Easter Bunny, or Tooth Fairy… He moves too slothly.
This article includes a collection of entertaining one-line jokes about sloths that you are free to use whenever someone brings up sloths in conversation. In your own conversations about sloths, you are allowed to use any of the jokes listed here.
More One-Liner Hysterical Sloth Jokes
- What did the cow say to the sloth in front of him? Get a moove on.
- What did the sloth say when he was mugged by a bunch of snails? It all happened so fast.
- Why couldn’t the girl find something to wear to school? The only things hanging in her closet were sloths.
- What do sloths do at their prom? Slow dance.
- What was the sloth doing on the road? Holding up traffic.
- What do you call intelligent sloths? Slo-mo sapien.
- Who’s a sloth’s favorite rapper? Lay-Z.
- What’s a sloth’s favorite piece of furniture? The sloth-fa.
- Why don’t sloths wear socks? They always have bear feet.
- What do you call a sloth who can hang from a limb for 24 hours straight? A slow-off.
- What do you get when you cross a sloth with two frogs? A: A two-toad sloth.
- What do sloths like to read? Snooze-papers.
- What does a sloth say before it has a party? Let’s get sloth-ed.
- Why did the sloth get a computer science degree? To become a sloth-ware engineer.
- Why did the sloth condition its fur? To make it sloth-t.
Funny Fun Sloths Moments
- What do you say to a sloth who wants to quit? Hang it there!
- What do you get when you cross a cat with a sloth? A slow leopard.
- What do sloths do after a snowstorm? A: They throw slow balls at each other.
- Sloths never kiss on the first date… They take it slow.
- What’s a sloth’s favorite song? Don’t Hurry, Be Happy.
- What do you call a sloth that barely moves a muscle? A slow-off.
- Sloths are the most social animals. They always want to hang out.
- What does the sloth journalist read every morning when he gets to work? A snooze paper.
- Guess what my favorite animal is? It’s a sloth… and I like you slooow much!
- A sloth tells his wife – I’m gonna stop by the neighbor’s house. I’ll see you in three months.
- Why do sloths always win at poker? Because they’re experts at bluffing!
- How do you make a sloth laugh? Just tell it a slow joke!
- How do you know if a sloth is having a bad day? It’s moving faster than usual!
- What did the sloth say when it was asked to hurry up? I can’t, I’m a sloth.
- Why did the sloth refuse to take a bath?  He didn’t want to wash his coat!
Funny Puns
- In his sloth-phomore year of college, Charlie the Sloth took a course on speed reading. He was still pretty sloth.
- What did the sloth wear to the swimming pool? His speedo.
- What did God tell the sloth upon its creation? You’re pretty slow so here, take these claws.
- Did you know Shakespeare took so long to write Othello, it should have been titled “Slothello“???
- You need to hurry… slotherwise you’ll be late!
- Sloths would probably NOT make good Santa Claws because they’re so sloooooth.
Other Posts You Might Enjoy
- Funny Sloth Family Album Video by Sloth Of The Day
- Funny Sloths Having a Great Day in Video Compilation
- Sloth Daily Fun To-Do List Video Sloth of The Day
Sloth Quotes
Follow Sloth of The Day on YoutubeJust for fun here are some sloth quotes by some amazing people.
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Bonus Free Just Made Sloth Jokes
Well as I put together this article I thought of some new hilarious sloth jokes. The jokes below were made by me Leo Garcia, and I placed them down below. And to make it even more fun for me, I’m thinking of one for each of my websites. Hope You like them. Enjoy!
100 – “A sloth’s TOP typing speed is no joke at two words per hour” ~ Leo Garcia Books
101 – “How come sloths do not like having a yard sale? Because it takes them forever to set up!” ~ LG Bookshelf
102 – “How come Sloths Do Not Go Fishing? They are too slow to set the hook” ~ Fishing Stone
104 – “What does a sloth need to start his day? A Sloth needs 8 pots of coffee just to get going” ~ Hard Core Coffee Drinker
105 – “Of course, a sloth needs coffee to get started on his day and wine to unwind at the end of it” ~ coffee n wine
106 – “How come Sloth likes yoga so much? Because it’s the only exercise where you can really take your time!” ~ Using Yoga
107 – “To Sloth or Not To Sloth? To Sloth of Course!” ~ My Social Quotes
108 – “Why Did The Sloth Like His Car? Because it allowed him to move faster” ~ Car Lover Tips
109 – “How did the sloth survive extinction? He moved at a glacial pace.” ~ Sloth of The Day
110 – “Sloth finally walks to the bar and tells the bartender… Mind if I wait for a bit? 🙂
Other Posts You Might Like
- DMV Sloths Scene from Zootopia The Movie
- Zootopia Movie Trailer Featuring DMV Sloths
- Draw a Cute Sloth With This Step By Step Video Tutorial
- Funny Sloth Family Album Video by Sloth Of The Day
Hilarious Sloth Jokes That Will Have You Crying with Laughter
In this fun blog post Hilarious Sloth Jokes, we have assembled a compilation of the most hilarious sloth jokes that will make you burst out laughing.
These jokes are meant to make you laugh and leave you with a smile on your face. They range from amusingly funny sloth jokes to witty one-liner jokes.
Please let us know which one is your favorite sloth joke in the comments below. If you have a good sloth joke, please leave it in the comments, we would love to add it to this list.
As a sloth lover, I could talk about all these hilarious sloth jokes all day. But also as a sloth… “I was gonna procrastinate today… but I never got around to it :-)” Yes, that’s one more sloth joke for the road.
We love making sloth gear here at Sloth of The Day. You can see some of the sloth books we have made @ Leo Garcia Books.
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We have learned a lot and have met some cool fellow sloth lovers. Hope you have enjoyed this Hilarious Sloth Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud Post. Thank you for visiting. Sloth On!
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